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Work Ethic – Seeing Mummy Work isn’t a Bad Thing

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Have you ever picked up your phone in front of your children and felt guilty? Have you ever spent time on your laptop, whilst your children have been in the same room? I have, a lot.

When I first started to call this writing lark my work, I tried my best to confine my working hours to when the kids were napping or in bed at night. It just wasn’t enough though. I’ve been self-employed for many years and I know what it takes to build a business. I know that an hour here and there will not suffice. Work does leak into the hours that my children are wakeful and do you know something? That’s OK.

At first I felt a tremendous amount of guilt. I thought that my children shouldn’t see me on my phone or laptop. They should have my undivided attention, no matter what. I was the one that chose to give up my business to bring up my children, who was I to decide to build up another in the mean time?

I know, ridiculous right? Building up a business is an amazing achievement. The first time I did it, I literally had no choice. It was sink or swim and do you know something? I swam, exceptionally well. I put in the time and effort it takes to build up an incredibly successful business and that’s something to be proud of.

So you see, it makes no sense that I’ve felt guilty for working in front of my children. It makes no sense that I’ve tried to shelter them from witnessing the hard work that goes into making something of yourself. Surely this is something they should witness.

I’ve come to realise that the hours I spend working on my blog, the effort I put into writing for some amazing causes and brands should be recognised, not pushed to the side. So what if mummy is on social media, it paid for the last holiday we enjoyed as a family. So what if mummy is constantly taking photographs, it paid the electric bill last month.

The most important thing to take from this is that having drive and ambition is an amazing trait and it’s one that should be celebrated. Your children seeing you on social media, writing blog posts and replying to emails just demonstrates what it takes to be successful in the world of work.

 

Looks like a working weekend with the troops 💻 #work #mygirls

A post shared by Blogger • Mother • Wife (@thetaleofmummyhood) on

 

 

49 Comments

  • Folakemi August 1, 2017 at 7:12 am

    You should be very proud of yourself for being a hard working and positive role model to your children. Drive and ambition are traits that will take them far in life. Besides, I once read a study that showed children with working moms are more likely to complete higher education. #twinklytuesday

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 3, 2017 at 8:27 pm

      Thankyou 🙂 xx

      Reply
  • Nichole Goodland August 1, 2017 at 7:17 am

    That is so great you can do that. I have really struggled to get any further with my blog because my girls really don’t allow me to have the time to do so. Maybe in the future that will change.

    #dreamteam

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 3, 2017 at 8:26 pm

      Ah bless you, it’s really not easy when you have children at home xx

      Reply
  • Southern Mummy August 1, 2017 at 8:38 am

    I know what you mean. I am working hard to get an income working from home. I’m on maternity leave and I don’t think I can afford to go back to work for longafer because of childcare cost. So Iam working hard to create something I can fall back on if that is the case. Yes I do feel guilty, very guilty but its for the greater good x #twinklytuesday

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 3, 2017 at 8:25 pm

      Childcare costs are just crazy aren’t they! Absolutely, it’s worth all of the hard work xx

      Reply
  • Mrs Jibril August 1, 2017 at 1:30 pm

    I couldn’t agree more, you shouldn’t feel guilty that your blogging or promoting on social media while the kids are awake. It’s work after all #TwinklyTuesday

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 3, 2017 at 8:24 pm

      Thanks lovely 🙂

      Reply
  • Tubbs August 2, 2017 at 11:21 am

    Showing children the variety of work that’s out there and teaching them the value of it seems a brilliant idea to me.

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 3, 2017 at 8:23 pm

      Absolutely!

      Reply
  • Yvadney @ Mums That Slay August 2, 2017 at 1:26 pm

    I work from home, my ‘studio/ office’ takes up the dining room and my kids know that mummy works from home. I love the flexibility, and they’re used to my ‘Be quiet’ telephone glare. Happy Mum, Happy kids! Yvadney x #DreamTeam

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 3, 2017 at 8:22 pm

      Ah it sounds like you have a good thing going! xx

      Reply
  • ruth cartwright August 4, 2017 at 7:20 am

    It’s a fine balancing act. #Blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:33 pm

      Too true xx

      Reply
  • Jo - Cup of Toast August 4, 2017 at 9:35 am

    Such a good post, I needed to read that at the moment. First and foremost I’m there for them, but they do see me working and it’s not always a bad thing to actively demonstrate determination and hard work!

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:32 pm

      Thankyou! xx

      Reply
  • Nicola August 4, 2017 at 10:48 am

    I love this post! And I sit here on my phone promoting my posts I can also relate to it! #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:32 pm

      Thankyou! x

      Reply
  • anywaytostayathome August 4, 2017 at 4:56 pm

    After I left work to be at home for a year I tried so hard to do all my blogging and freelance work whilst L was in bed or napping, that was the point after all. But then one day I had to get some stuff done and L said something along the lines of, but you don’t work you’re a mummy , only daddy’s work. It didn’t sit well with me. So then I started letting him him see that I do work. We also had a very long conversation about how everyone works and that being a mummy is a job (I didn’t mention how flipping hard it was though!!!) #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:31 pm

      It’s just impossible to fit it all into nap time isn’t it! I would have felt the same as you, it’s good that they know mummy works too! xx

      Reply
  • Jo - Pickle & Poppet August 4, 2017 at 8:22 pm

    I think as long as there is the right balance then it is fine. Children need to understand how things ‘appear’. I don’t work from home, I go out to the office so they see that. It’s good for children to see how hard work pays off #Blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:30 pm

      I totally agree, it’s all about finding the right balance xx

      Reply
  • Stephanie August 5, 2017 at 2:23 am

    Yes, yes, yes! I need to read posts like this because I feel guilty all the time for not always playing with him when he wants me or that I’m missing out on time with him because I’m working. Truth is that if I didn’t work at home, I’d be missing so much more. #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:28 pm

      That is so true! xx

      Reply
  • Rhi August 5, 2017 at 8:08 am

    I run a small business and I’m trying to build up my blogging, nothing wrong with your children seeing you working. It can be a bonus for them to see that they could be self-employed too. I like to think maybe I’m inspiring the next generation of our entrepreneurs #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:28 pm

      Here, here! xx

      Reply
  • bringinguptheberneys August 5, 2017 at 11:16 am

    I was discussing this with my partner the other day, whilst my blog is still small and new-ish, I don’t feel like I give it enough time because I feel SO guilty for being on the computer/phone in front of my kids…But you’re right, you don’t get this far without putting a lot of effort in, and that is something that your kids should definitely see and aspire to do too! If you don’t put the effort in, you won’t get much out! #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:25 pm

      It’s so hard to get the right balance isn’t it! xx

      Reply
  • mud cakes and wine August 5, 2017 at 2:27 pm

    The boys just want to play on my laptop when it comes out. but they think it is great when i am uplaoding pictures of bees and flowers #Blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:24 pm

      Mine aren’t at that stage yet, but I don’t think it’s far away! xx

      Reply
  • Nicola Bromley August 5, 2017 at 6:12 pm

    I have often felt guilty but I think the hardest thing is getting them to understand that you are actually working. Especially when they are little, it can be difficult to explain to them that Mummy needs 20 minutes to just get through these emails. Mine don’t even really get it now and they are 6 and 13!! #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:23 pm

      It is really hard to explain, if only they understood working with littles would be a breeze! xx

      Reply
  • mummyhereandthere August 5, 2017 at 7:40 pm

    Hell yeah you go, you sound very dedicated and a positive role model for your children X #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:22 pm

      Thankyou! x

      Reply
  • talkingmums1 August 6, 2017 at 1:15 pm

    Thank you so much for this Zoe, You’ve put such a different way of thinking on this subject. I always feel guilty for picking up my phone in front of the kids but when it’s work related I shouldn’t feel guilty. I do try and say to my eldest that I’m working! x
    #Blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 6, 2017 at 4:22 pm

      It definitely is work! Thanks so much for a lovely comment xx

      Reply
  • mummy2twindividuals August 6, 2017 at 7:24 pm

    For you this is absolutely right as it’s your job and makes an income. However I feel really guilty fitting in the promotion side of blogging into my day when my girls are awake. Until I can earn money from it, blogging is just a hobby and so I feel I shouldn’t be doing it instead of being with them. #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 7, 2017 at 12:40 pm

      It’s hard to find the right balance isn’t it xx

      Reply
  • RawChildhood August 6, 2017 at 8:28 pm

    I agree. Whilst doing my degree I always told Leo about what I was doing and what I was doing it for. It made him appreciate that things you want take hard work and to not give up. He came to my graduation ceremony last month and proudly sat there watching me get my degree! 🙂 #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 7, 2017 at 12:40 pm

      Ah I bet it was so lovely to have him there to witness you collecting your degree, well done you for fitting it all in! xx

      Reply
  • Musings of a tired mummy...zzz... August 6, 2017 at 8:40 pm

    I do feel guilty all the time if my work or blog takes me away from the kids so try to do as much of it as possible after they have gone to bed #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 7, 2017 at 12:39 pm

      It’s really hard not to feel guilty isn’t it xxx

      Reply
  • Muffintopmummyblog August 6, 2017 at 10:38 pm

    Yes, you’re totally right! I often feel guilty sneaking in a quick check of social media or trying to join linkies while I’m with my daughter, but it’s not for fun, it IS work (or at least, it’s building up that way) and as long as I’m not ignoring her for hours, I think that’s OK. We’re all just trying our best – I think showing your children a great work ethic is a brilliant thing! #blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 7, 2017 at 12:38 pm

      It’s absolutely OK and it’s definitely work! xx

      Reply
  • The Queen of Collage August 7, 2017 at 4:52 pm

    Feeling guilty is something we mothers do a lot of. I think it’s great to be a role model for our children. #Blogstravaganza

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 7, 2017 at 9:37 pm

      Here, here! xx

      Reply
  • mummascribbles August 7, 2017 at 6:30 pm

    This is so totally right! I gave up my job which took me out of the home. Ok so I am on social media and checking emails throughout the day but I am here, at home, cooking their tea and being with them. If I wasn’t doing the blog, I would be out at work and they would be in childcare. Thanks for writing this. And thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

    Reply
    • The Tale of Mummyhood August 7, 2017 at 9:37 pm

      Thankyou! xx

      Reply

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